Wh**ptee - D**

Two Cheaters Side-by-Side

I’m not going to jump up and down. I won’t.

I know the Nationals desperately needed an adequate back up catcher for Jesus Flores. I know they needed a catcher who could start for when Jesus Flores goes on the disabled list for an extended stay (like he has the past few years).

The Nats did that – and they did so by inking a sure-fire Hall of Fame catcher in the twilight of his career. Ivan “Pudge” Rodriguez.

I put the “Pudge” in quotes not because he uses that as his nickname, rather because I cannot believe the media still has the audacity to use it. I mean, really, does this REALLY look like a guy who should be called “Pudge?”:

That doesn’t even look like the same guy. And don’t normal humans typically put on weight over the course of time. The dude’s 38 and looks like he lost 30-40 pounds in the past couple of years. This is a professional athlete who’s supposed to be building muscle and working out and he LOST that much?

If I were Carlton Fisk, I’d throw up in my mouth every time I hear that hack Karl Ravech from ESPN call Ivan Rodriguez “Pudge.”

I know it’s not been proven, I know I am only speculating and no, I cannot prove anything, but if steroids were to help any one position on the field more than any other it would be catcher – and Rodriguez played for the Rangers, the same team Jose Canseco was playing for when Canseco was handing out syringes like lollipops at a bank drive-thru window.

Again, no proof, but COME ON.

I appreciate that the Nats are trying to improve the team on the field and I honestly believe this move will help the team in a desperate need area. I will continue to root for the Nationals to improve, but I will NOT root for Ivan Rodriguez. I hope to God that Jesus Flores plays 162 games per season for the next two years and Ivan Rodriguez never sees the field. I know it’s unrealistic, but I don’t care.

Ivan Rodriguez will make the hall of Fame someday strictly because of his offensive numbers because that’s all that most members of the BBWA care about anymore anyway. They’ll overlook his laziness behind the plate in favor of that rocket arm that was bolstered artificially be steroids. They’ll ignorantly put him in failing to take into account that he probably would never have eclipsed the real Pudge for games behind the plate because the only way he could’ve possibly pulled it off was to inject himself with a substance that allowed him to do so.

Bully for you “Pudge.” You keep on sticking around and continue looking as skinny as a high-school freshman playing flute in the band while living the lie of an ex-steroid user. I’ll not root for you and I would sincerely hope nobody else in Natstown does either.